MY TURBULENT SOUL

The past serves me no inspiration,

The present offers me doubts and confusion,

The future promises me a hope as far as the horizon,

The only near sound seems to be that of my emotions.

Peace and comfort I only find when I scribble my reflections,

Only after enduring loneliness and meditation,

Transitioning to prayer and petition,

Chin pointed up, arms stretched high in adoration.

Finally sieving out the mental lies and deception,

Reminding myself that I am on a journey of sanctification,

The Holy Spirit slowly continuing the work of perfection,

A work that began in faith and regeneration,

Standing firm on the assurance of my salvation,

Having played no penny on the price of my redemption,

Only by God’s grace will this journey come to completion,

For I was chosen through divine election.

How come nobody talked to me about “The Process?”

That the Journey I am on will be ruthless,

Like a hot spring, my soul will be restless,

That before I inspire I have to regress!

Dying to self for self-effort is useless.

That we all carry HIS treasure in clay vessels.

Time and time again we will crush in failure and weakness.

That we will be preyed by darkness and sadness,

Our souls still desiring to be selfish and rebellious.

Choosing to impress than to witness.

Taking pride in our sacrifice instead of obedience,

Pursuing a journey of self-gratification instead of making disciples,

Before long, we come crushing down from our delusional towers,

Only for His grace to take us back at the foot of the cross,

In self-abandonment, we call on His name to save us,

Faithful as always, He answers us from his throne in the heavens.

Shalom